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Have you ever felt lonely in your relationship?

If you answered yes, do not feel like you are all by yourself, you are part of a very big club.

Loneliness or solitude

There are two words for the state of being alone. One word is solitude, which is enjoying being alone so you can re-charge your battery if need be. The other word is lonely, which is the state of being alone when we do not want to be.

What to do, what to do?

When you find yourself feeling lonely in the middle of your relationship, here are some things you can do:

1. Don't panic. This feeling occurs in many relationships. It's what you do about that is important.

2. Talk about it. Folks, when it comes to strong emotions, what we do not talk out, we act out. Sure it is a risk to bring it up, but it's a bigger risk not to bring it up. Many times, if you are feeling lonely, so is the other person.

3. Make a plan. Talk about the times when the two of you felt the closest and most connected. Then make a plan to do some of those things again.

4. Work the plan. Making a plan does not change anything. Working a plan changes things.

Jeff Herring

Jeff is a marriage and family therapist, singles and relationship coach, mentor coach, speaker, syndicated relationship columnist and author.

Jeff has a full time private practice in Tallahassee in which he specializes in couples, teen and parent counseling. He also is a relationship coach specializing in working with couples and singles. Some of his professional activities include:

==> Internationally syndicated relationship columnist through Knight-Ridder/Tribune Media Services, with a weekly readership of over 10 million worldwide

==> Sought after speaker for organizations, associations, churches, and corporations

==>Twice weekly appearances on The Steve and Sara Show on Magic 107.1

==> Author of "Keep the Changes: 52 Tools for Successful Living" a collection of his best columns, as well as several e-books including "How to Create a Passionate and Loving Relationship.........Forever," "How to Beat the BOZOs: Dealing with difficult people without becoming one," and "Tame Your Teen: THE survival guide for parenting your teenager.

==> Founder and CEO of TheArticleGuy.com

==> Founder and CEO of SecretsofGreatRelationships.com

==> Founder and CEO of ParentingYourTeeanger.com

==> Founder and CEO of ToolsforSuccessfulLiving.com

==> President of BuildingYourIdealPractice.com

==> President of ConsciousDatingTallahassee.com